Starting to Cope With Parcopresis
Steps to taking charge
Progress seems to need:
1. Recognizing there is something you can do to start taking charge of this, YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE THIS BY FINDING THIS SITE.
2. Finding out you are not the only one. On the message board you will find again and again that others claim they felt alone and had no one to talk to or share their anxieties with. Well, no longer!
3. Recognizing it is most likely to be an anxiety thing. For most professionals
interested in this area they consider it to be a type of SOCIAL PHOBIA.
A phobia such as:
fear of going into a lift, or
of flying, or
of public speaking etc.
is an anxiety response to an irrational fear. That is, there are hidden processes going on in the mind that prevent someone from doing normal everyday things that most people don't find difficult. In other words, a phobia stops you from doing things you would like to do. You might feel stupid about this and try to hide your responses. You put on a mask to disguise the person you really are. You find excuses to avoid the situation that worries you, or excuses to not tell anyone in case they think you are weird or stupid or 'mental'.
4. Telling someone (partner, best friend etc) - yes this sounds impossible but it works. Many people find this difficult to do, but once they have taken this first step in self-control they get a real sense of relief to be able to stop putting on the mask and getting on to an honest relationship with someone you trust and/or love. Give them a chance to love and trust you as well. You don't need to take out an advert in the local paper, with pictures! There are things that you don't want to share with all your workmates etc. Just start to tell the people you are with a lot of the time, family, friends etc. You will be surprised at the amount of understanding you will get.
5. Consider going to your doctor or medical centre to tell them about the
problem. Not all medics understand about this. Take some information from
this site with you. If they don't really know about this, tell them about
this website. Ask the doctor to refer you to a gastroenterologist for an examination
to make sure that there are no physical problems.
6. You can also ask for a referral to see a psychologist. That does not
mean you are crazy, it is just realizing that the best help is likely to come
from someone experienced in dealing with phobias generally. They can help
by taking you through the stages designed to help overcome your fears. You
can of course go and see one privately. For help in getting a recognised psychologist
(in the United Kingdom) go to:
This is a site which provides only the names of well-trained responsible members. In other countries, there should be a similar directory available on the net.
7. Starting to develop a "can do" attitude. Positive thinking is very important. Because of one problem, some people can start feeling negative about themselves and getting to the position where everything is hopeless. They then feel totally helpless. You again are now beyond that point by logging on to this website: keep on with that process.